Just back from the IT Staff Appreciation Breakfast. A few notable awards:
All that, and breakfast too. (No burritos, but one can’t hope for perfection on this earth.)
On Friday night, Emily disappeared into her room for about 3 hours, only emerging briefly and intermittently, looking increasingly like a chimney-sweep at the end of a hard day each time I saw her. My curiosity was, of course, piqued, but she refused to let me see what she was up to until she finished what she’d been working on. I was therefore floored when she brought this out into the living room:
(click for more detail)
It’s a stunning piece. She has actually been working on for much longer than the 3 hours she was tucked away in her room. A few weeks back, she asked if I had any sheet music she could use. We dug through my music drawer together, eventually coming up with some dense piano piece with lots of black notes. She tore that up and mounted it on a large canvas, tearing off the margins and tiling the sheets as densely as she could manage. Thursday’s 3 hour marathon was just charcoaling the image on top of the sheet music base.
Kathy was so impressed with the work that she immediately bought it from Emily and mounted it over the couch in our living room — a good step up from the refrigerator where the kids’ art usually ends up!
Emily continues to impress me with her artistic skills, not only because I completely lack them, but because of the increasingly ambitious and skilled work she is taking on, and because she continues to push herself and to get better and better. Great stuff!
This year we decided to do Sandfest properly. I went prowling for places to stay a couple months ago, and somehow managed to secure a wonderful house right on the beach, an easy stroll from Sandfest itself. The big, open house with lots of places to sleep worked out great for our mob, which numbered as many as 18 at times (not including the dogs). We had a magnificent time playing in the water, building castles, eating too much, playing cards, fishing, and generally enjoying time with family.
A few of the highlights for me:
It was a wonderful trip; several people suggested that we make an annual thing of renting that place for Sandfest so that we can all enjoy it together again.
You can see some of our photos here on Facebook.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
This past weekend, the family was down in Port Aransas for Sandfest. As we were leaving town, we decided to stop by Bo Jon’s Surf & Gifts, a big gift shop near one of the central intersections with an entrance made up to look like a shark’s mouth, about 2:00pm. While we were there, Kathy decided to visit the restroom. As she was coming out of the restroom, a large stepladder which had been left propped against the wall fell over and struck Kathy on the head.
I saw the ladder falling, but wasn’t close enough to catch it before it hit her. Kathy immediately sat down on the floor, stunned and hurt. I put the ladder back upright, making sure it was propped far enough from the wall that it wouldn’t fall again. I told the workers at the front desk that the ladder had fallen and struck my wife, and asked for ice. They poured some ice from a drink into a ziploc bag and gave it to us, and Kathy applied it to her head.
One of the counter workers, who turned out to be the owner’s daughter, then called the owner. She then came back over to where Kathy was still sitting on the floor with her head in her hands and, instead of asking after Kathy’s welfare or offering to help, asked us to start filling out an incident report. I grew angry at her, at which point she offered to put the owner (who later identified herself as Christie Maxwell) on the phone. Once on the phone, Ms. Maxwell was immediately hostile, and told me that I was out of line to want to speak with her about the situation. She told me that they always kept the ladder there, and that they had never had an accident before. She eventually agreed to give me the name of the person who handled their insurance, and I told her I would complete the incident report, which I then did.
Kathy was finally feeling well enough to stand up, so we took her out to the car and headed for a medical center that our friend Will had gotten directions to from the store staff. Unfortunately, the directions turned out to be unfollowable, so we ended up asking at convenience stores until we finally found out where the nearest hospital was — about 30 miles from the gift store. We made it there and checked Kathy, who was still in pain, disoriented, and nauseated, in to the Emergency Room.
With the kids all stationed out in the waiting room with our friends Will and April, we ended up staying there for about three hours. The doctor was concerned because of the nausea, and ordered a CAT scan for Kathy. Fortunately, the physical examination and the CAT scans all eventually came back OK, and the doctor discharged us with instructions not to leave Kathy alone for the next 24-48 hours and to wake her periodically during the night to be sure she was still lucid. We lit off for home, finally arriving back in San Marcos around 10:00pm.
Monday, April 21, 2008
8:30am: Called the subrogation department of Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Texas, our health insurance company. They were attentive, polite and helpful, and opened a file on the incident.
8:45am: Called Kathy Estep, the individual who the owner had said was handling their insurance. She was initially cordial, asking after Kathy’s welfare and telling me that she had the form and was filing it with their insurance company. I asked the name of the insurance company, figuring that, like with a car accident, exchanging insurance information was a reasonable thing to do. She said that their procedure was to let the insurance company contact me. I asked again, and she rebuffed me again. “So, to be clear, you’re refusing to give me the name of your insurance company?” I asked. “I’m not refusing anything,” she said, launched into a long verbal tirade during which she wouldn’t allow me to speak and concluded by hanging up on me.
8:53am: Called the City of Port Aransas Building Inspection Department to let them know what had happened and ask if they would mind dropping by and making sure the ladder had been moved someplace safer. The secretary seemed nonplused, but offered to take my number and to call back if she had any further questions.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Our Kathy is nearly back to normal, though she’s still having some headaches, which the Emergency Room doctor told her to expect for a few days.
In spite of Kathy Estep’s assurances, we have heard nothing from the shop’s insurance company. I’ve also heard nothing back from the city’s building inspector.
UPDATE: Monday, April 28, 2008
We still haven’t heard anything from Bo Jon’s insurance company. I called Blue Cross this morning to see if they had, but only ended up mired in their voice mail system. I also sent an email to Joe Lamb, the building inspector in Port Aransas, to ask if his department had an opportunity to check on the safety of the gift shop yet. Waiting on responses from all quarters.
UPDATE: August 2008
Blue Cross eventually must have reached them, because we got a letter from Columbia Insurance Group — the mystery insurance company revealed! — saying that they had been trying to contact us, but had been unsuccessful. (Presumably their efforts were carrier-pigeon based, as we never received any phone messages.) I sent them an email asking what information they needed. Rather than answering that question, they asked for a phone number where we could be reached. I sent them one, then sent them a follow-up email a week later when I heard nothing, then another follow up another week later.
UPDATE: September 5, 2008
I finally got a call from the Insurance company two weeks after sending them my number. Unfortunately, I missed it, and they only left a voice mail with their phone number (which, of course, I already had). I called them back again and got voice mail on their end. Sigh.
UPDATE: December 8, 2008
We’ve been in touch with the insurance company several times, given statements, provided documentation of the hospital visit, and finally got an offer to cover the hospital costs plus a small pain and suffering allowance. (We hadn’t asked for the latter, but it was nice of them to offer it.) We accepted the offer, and have been waiting for several weeks now. We still haven’t received the reimbursement check, but it seems that we’re finally getting close to the end of this.
Interestingly, some friends of the shop’s owner have apparently found this page. We have received several profane comments containing assertions that we never went to the hospital, ad hominem attacks against Kathy and me, and other unpleasantness. (I’ve not posted them, for obvious reasons.)
UPDATE: March 2009
We finally received our settlement check, and were able to reimburse our own insurance company for their costs. (They definitely benefited from the settlement more than we did!) I’m very glad to finally have this done, even though it took nearly a year to sort through it.
Conclusion
I have been deeply disappointed by the response of the shop’s employees, owners, and insurance representative. Their concern at every turn has seemed to be more with protecting themselves than with making their shop safe or helping people hurt because they failed to do so. I understand for the first time in my life the temptation to hire a slimy personal injury lawyer and to try to get something out of a miserable situation like this. (We haven’t succumbed, however.)
Will and April were a tremendous help during this time. Thanks a bunch, you guys.
I will keep updating this post as events warrant. In the meantime, I recommend steering well clear of Bo Jon’s whenever you’re in Port Aransas. We will certainly be doing so from now on.
Some original jokes to recently come* out of the humor mines where we mercilessly work our children night and day:
From Liam:
Q: Where do you get cold, hard cash?
A: At Frost Bank! (Note: this may be only regionally funny; I’m not sure how far away the aforementioned financial institution has branches.)
From Maggie:
Q: What does a crow say when it needs to go to the bathroom?
A: Caw-caw! (This is funnier if you say it out loud and know a bit of semi-naughty Spanish.)
One of the great joys of parenting is getting to see your kids begin to come up with stuff that surprises you, to see them reach beyond what you’ve given them. Terrible jokes are a respected tradition within our family, so it’s great to see them take the reins and begin to create groaners of their own.
* Yes, I split an infinitive. Bite me, grammarians.
A few goings-on of late that bear mentioning:
Last week, Liam brought home a small book that he had created in school. I thought it was great, so am posting its entire text verbatim here. Enjoy!
Playdate with my dad pg 1
“OOOOOOH” this is going to be fun I said gleefuly on an early summer morning. I am going on a very long play date with my dad. “It is going to be so fun” I said. First we went to a place called Peter Pan’s Mini Golf. I got a black putter with shiny new ornge ball. My dad got an ornge putter with a Shiny yellow ball. I got almost every hole a hole in one but two of them got hole in twos and one hole in three. one of the holes had a hill and I got a hole it two on that one. It was so fun at the mini golf place. Next we went to a very fun place called kid town. they have more mini golf, basketball, three playgrounds and a singing area (which you know I did not go on). First I played basket-ball. It made me so tird that I had to drink almost a gallon of water. Then I went back and played some more. Next I went and played on the playground for a very long time. my dad look lots of pictures of me.
Playdate with my dad pg 2
Next we went to a resaruant called the Alamo Steak house. I found a gum-ball machine and if you got a black gum ball you got a free meal and guess what!? I got one of the black ball’s so we got a free meal and I chose the all you can eat buffett. I nearly barfed because I ate so many fries! Next we went to go swim in the San marcos river. I was collecting rocks for my collection. I found a heart Shaped one and gave it to my dad. Next we played with water guns and water balloons up in the grass. I acidentaly knocked my dads glasses of his head but luckily he found them in the tall green grass. next we went to mr. gatties and ate pizzia. It tasted very good. Next we went to the game Room. I had one hundred tokens and i bet you can’t guest how many tickets I got!? four thousand eight hundred thirty seven. i got a pool table, lava lamp, glow in the dark things, a pretend samiri sord and too-tsie Rolls. Next we went home wathch pirates of the caribean and went to bed.
For her friend Michael’s birthday, Emily made these casts of her hand spelling out “LOVE”, mounted them on a board, and gave them individual paint jobs. It has now assumed a place of honor in his room next to the audio-animatronic Gene Simmons action figure.
Spectacular work, Em!
Happy New Year All!
Socrates tells us that “the unexamined life is not worth living.” In this era of YouTube exhibitionism, one could extend his maxim to be “the life unexamined by other people is not worth banner ads.” So, in the spirit of the age, welcome to our annual unsolicited “What the Clan McMains is up to letter”!
First up is Margaret. The smallest of the clan is now 7 years old, as inconceivable as that seems. She’s enjoying her first grade year in school, is doing well academically, and is looking forward to her rebuilt school reopening down the street from us in a week or so. She lost her first tooth this year, and continues to joyfully bounce around wherever she goes, evincing a joie de vivre that is a delight to be around.
Liam, now in 3rd grade, continues to do very well academically without too much apparent effort. He’s got more energy than he sometimes knows what to do with, and is endlessly fascinated by the world around him and trying to figure out how it all works. He’s enjoying both computer and tabletop games quite a lot, and created his first computer game earlier this year. By dint of endless experimentation and repetition, he has also learned some songs on piano and guitar this year.
11 year old Abigail is alternately quietly contemplative and outrageously silly. She’s plugging away at school, and has developed a fondness for oriental gardens and bonsai. She has also decided to eat vegetarian, and has done remarkably well sticking to that plan. School has allowed her to develop a larger social circle than she has had before, which has been a treat for her. She has begun working in earnest on French Horn and Violin this year.
Emily is now in her Freshman year at San Marcos High School, and has found a group of friends there who she enjoys immensely. She continues to attend Youth Service Bureau regularly, and to create some really terrific drawing and other artwork. This year she became the chief toad herder in our family, gathering up to a dozen at a time in the kitchen sink when their cries came ringing in from our neglected pool. She seems to have worked her way through the most difficult part of adolescence at this point, and is generally at a happy place in her life.
Kathy returned to University this year to finish out an undergraduate degree. She’s settled into the field of Therapeutic Recreation, and has been putting a lot into and getting a lot out of the program at Texas State University. She has pinned down a couple of scholarships, and maintained a 4.0 GPA through both the spring and fall semesters. (She took a break during the summer to be with the kids.) It has been grueling at times, but she’s done an admirable job with it and earned considerable praise from professors and serious-minded classmates. She’s currently in Australia for a conference one of her professors asked her to help with.
Sean continued work at Texas State University where he’s splitting his time between programming and management responsibilities and enjoying a tightly-knit team of sharp and fun people. He also attended his first Sacred Harp sing, visited Portland for the first time, caught up with some long lost friends from high school, went to Boston with old friends, visited Los Angeles for a dear friend’s wedding, built a hovercraft, went to Waco for the All University Sing, hiked the recently formed Canyon Lake Gorge, and continues to play bass with The Patio Boys (formerly the Grant Mazak Band). (Shenanigans are chronicled at https://www.mcmains.net/.)
A few of our family travel highlights this year included Ink’s Lake State park for Spring Break and a visit to Mo Ranch for a Father’s Day weekend church retreat. Kathy and Sean also enjoyed a weekend in Fredericksburg for their 12th anniversary and Crawfish Festival.
As a group, we continue to find our physical needs met and count ourselves extraordinarily rich in the other things that are important in our lives: vital friendships, loving and supportive family, and ample opportunities to love God and other people. Thanks to all of you who are a part of that! For those who haven’t been recently, we hope you’ll come and see us if you happen to be in the area!
Grace, peace, and hope for a rich and wonderful 2008 to you all!
A Pragmatist’s Love Song
I have not fallen in love with you,
as if love were a puddle into which one trips
by accident, and from which one might stumble just as easily.I am not mad about you,
our love a confused and screaming Bedlam,
filled with unreal fears and phantasms that don’t know truth.You have not captured my heart,
as if it were a frightened animal that one can snare
and cage but which always longs for the solitary forest.You are neither my northern star,
my sun nor my moon, for one cannot set another’s path
or illumine his world.Our love is not eternal,
but will one day be completed
when we finally meet Love face to face.But you are my wife. I choose to take your hand and walk through our years together. I will lean on you when I stumble, and support you when you are tired. I will stand by you when the last of the children marches off to make her own life, and will hold you when you cry. I am on your side when you’re a saint and when you’re a shrew. I will cheer for you, play with you, support your adventures, listen to your fears, rejoice with your victories, mourn with your losses, hope and pray with you, and always be your friend. I love you.
Presented to Kathy on the occasion of her 33rd birthday. Many thanks to Daniel Priest, my one-man writer’s workshop.